Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
