After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
