The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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