I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
