so explain again why im purple
no
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
