hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
