yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
