I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
