Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
