Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
