Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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