now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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