I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
we're making bets on your personal life
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
