I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
