we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
How's work?
Spinning.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize