Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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