So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
