Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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