Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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