once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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