you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
