this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
