how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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