Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I will be naked everywhere
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
