Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
