OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My dick has a subreddit
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize