Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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