problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
