I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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