just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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