all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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