i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
