He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
