Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
