what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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