Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
