based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize