At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Randomize
