I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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