She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
