did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I just want to make out with him forever
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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