I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
