Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
