yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
