You really coming over, don't trick.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
