I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
