physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
