he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Just puked most of my soul out..
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
