Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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