I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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