oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Even the bartender felt bad for me
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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